Assembly FC

From Alun Davies AM:

Dear all,

Somewhat surprisingly, and certainly unbelievably [no kidding], I have been asked to captain the Assembly's Football Team in the annual Parliamentary Shield competition supported [somewhat ironically] by McDonald's.

This year the [pissup] event takes place in London on the weekend of the 4th and 5th August, giving us the chance to play against elected representatives from Westminster, the Northern Ireland Assembly and the Scottish Parliament for the Parliamentary Shield and a [happy meal] cheque for the charity of our choice.

By taking part in the tournament we not only have the opportunity to show off our footballing skills (!) and win money for charity but we also have the chance to [get drunk with] meet many colleagues from the different Parliaments and Assemblies across the UK, talk tactics with our celebrity manager Ian Rush and watch the Community Shield match between Manchester United and Chelsea at the new Wembley stadium the following day (Sunday 5th August)! [uh oh, freebie alert]

If you don't feel you are able to join in the actual football game (but have
a husband, wife or partner who would) then you are more than welcome to join the team! [Note further gratuitous use of the exclamation mark!]

If you are interested in joining us or would like to find out more about the
tournament then please contact me and I will endeavour to answer any
questions that you may have. [!!!]

Places in the squad are limited to 15 so if I could ask that you let me know
of your interest before Thursday (21st June) so that I can ensure you are
sent all of the relevant details ASAP.

Best regards,
Alun

Alun Davies AC / AM

Llafur - Y Canolbarth a'r Gorllewin
Labour - Mid and West Wales
***************************************
Well, isn't that droll? Anyway, I'm appointing myself manager, so heregoes:

Goalkeeper: Dafydd El. Nothing gets past him, and if it did he'd glass them with a bottle of Ty Nant.

Left Back: Huw Lewis. Didn't get promoted, see.
Right Back: Where we started if Mike German does another u-turn.
Centre Back: Rosemary Butler. The James Collins of AFC.
Centre Back: Carl Sargeant. Charged with mopping up.

Left Wing: Helen Mary Jones
Right Wing: Ieuan Wyn Jones
Deputy Midfield Ball-winner with responsibility for passing sideways: Leighton Andrews
Playmaker: Alun Cairns (if he can get time off school)

Up front: Eleanor Burnham and Peter Black

Referee: Trish the Law

UPDATE: Page six of today's Western Mail - can anyone spot something funny?

Labels: , ,

posted by Blamerbell @ 12:07 pm,

11 Comments:

At 1:50 pm, Blogger Christopher Glamorgan said...

Don't drop Mike German from the team, whatever you do - he's a right little goal hanger! Just make sure that he's nowhere near his own goal :-D

 
At 2:05 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

We need more AMs for a greater player base. Another good reason for a Parlimanet!

 
At 2:10 pm, Blogger Seneddwr said...

Your squad is as amusing as Alun Davies' email is absurd.

I'm sure that there is some sort of legislation somewhere to prevent people who use too many exclamation marks holding public office. Isn't there?!?!?!

 
At 2:30 pm, Anonymous Marcus renewed labour said...

Cieran,

If you are referring to the peter hain facebook photo!!

Yea its me, you and withers...

 
At 2:35 pm, Blogger Penddu said...

If you dont let Mike German in your team he will try and play for the other side - splitter...

 
At 3:33 pm, Anonymous mildred said...

Well done Blamer- they just can't keep you out of the news!

 
At 10:15 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

UPDATE: the people of Wales voted to elect a team manager. Rhodri Morgan got most votes. IWJ second, Nick Bourne third, Mike German fourth.

However, the votes of the public are merely a preliminary to the business end of the election: the negotiations between the candidates themselves.

It has been agreed that IWJ, having come second, will decide who becomes manager. Either him, or the man who beat him to first place.

Everybody agrees this is the grown-up, progressive way to select a football manager. Especially if you're IWJ.

The punters who voted in the first place have long since forgotten about the football tournament and think Gordon Brown is the new manager of Assembly FC.

 
At 11:07 pm, Anonymous Iolo said...

Blamer, this stuff from the self-proclaimed former chairman of the Welsh nationalists must be a spoof?

If only the mainstream media broadcast this guff to the voters.

 
At 9:04 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

well the naked deliveries made me laugh although i suppose i am meant to be looking for a high brow political reference

 
At 1:06 pm, Blogger Glyn Davies said...

I played in the Assembly team during the last few years - and we took it much more seriously than Alun seems to be doing. Hard tackling, national honour and only very little socialising and drinking. All this talk of 'fun' will mean that not many Assembly Members will want to play.

 
At 1:42 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

glyn davies said

"All this talk of 'fun' will mean that not many Assembly Members will want to play. "

So count Blamerbell sacked as manager then ;-P

 

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