Said and done
Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Without doubt, the most common criticism of politicians is that they allow torrents of unmitigated tosh to spew forth from their mouths at every available opportunity. Normal people can tell that they are talking complete rubbish. For some strange reason, politicians cannot.

This election campaign was no different.

Here's my handy guide to what they said, as opposed to what actually happened:

Rhodri Morgan (Labour)
"If we don’t get our vote out and the three minor parties do, a Tory-led coalition will trundle Wales backwards as a country at a rate of knots.

This election is the choice between a return to a grim Tory past and a bright Labour future.

This election is about that stark choice between seeing the dole queues continue to get shorter and shorter under Labour or risking a return to 120,000 people on the dole in Wales, with the Tories in charge."

Imagine my disappointment when I woke up on May 4th and, despite there being no Labour majority, Wales wasn't hurtling backwards at a rate of knots outside my window. Neither was there any kind of Tory-led coalition to speak of. Nor a 120,000-long dole queue snaking down the street. The only queue was for the ice cream van down the road, and I don't think any of those people had even bothered to vote.

Ieuan Wyn Jones (Plaid)
"We can win five seats in North Wales. Me as the First Minister elected from Anglesey (if the party does well in the rest of Wales) and Dafydd Wigley on the list aswell with Janet Ryder”"

Number of seats won by Plaid in North Wales: 4
Number of votes between Dafydd Wigley and a return to Welsh politics: 6,644

Nick Bourne (Conservative)
"Plaid Cymru's vague aspirations and wild spending plans will not fool voters. They are a clear indication that the nationalists are neither responsible nor a serious political party."

Number of seats won by Plaid Cymru: 15 (+3)
Number of seats won by the Conservatives: 12 (+1)
Conclusion: Voters were 'fooled' by Plaid Cymru's 'vague aspirations and wild spending plans'. Idiots.

Mike German (Lib Dems)
"The more votes we get, the more seats we win, the more influence we will have in the new Assembly government.

Our party has great hopes on the regional lists. But I have to tell you the regional list is more misunderstood than Richard Brunstrom in a room full of Labour MPs.

We can win extra seats in every part of Wales."

Number of extra seats won in every party of Wales: 0
Number of extra seats won in any part of Wales: 0
Lib Dem share of the regional vote in 2003: 12.7%
Lib Dem share of the regional vote in 2007: 11.8%
Number of leaflets delivered by Lib Dem activists: 4,367,892,562,099,454,235,861...

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